*** Please note that any speculation about diagnoses of people discussed in this article are purely speculative and not real diagnoses. In order to give a real diagnosis, the person would have to be a client of mine.”***
The heartbreaking story of Brian Laundrie and Gabby Petito gripped the nation in 2021. What began as an Instagram-worthy "van life" adventure soon morphed into a horrifying tale of emotional abuse, control, and ultimately murder. While the world was glued to the news, dissecting social media posts and combing through body cam footage, many missed the critical psychological dynamics at play.
Behind the idyllic road trip photos was a relationship steeped in toxic control, emotional manipulation, and personality disorders that, tragically, culminated in Gabby's death. Now, we’re going to explore the psychological profile of Brian Laundrie and dive deep into his potential diagnoses: Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) and Antisocial Personality Disorder (ASPD). These aren't just fancy labels—they give us real insight into why people like Laundrie behave the way they do.
Emotional Abuse was Brian’s Favorite (And Only) Relationship Skill
Let's start with the basics: emotional abuse, which Laundrie seemed to have down to a science. This type of abuse doesn’t leave bruises, but it’s just as damaging, if not more so (I would argue). Emotional abuse is all about one thing: control. And let’s face it, Brian Laundrie was all about control.
In the police bodycam footage from the Moab, Utah incident, Gabby was clearly falling apart—crying, anxious, a bundle of nerves. And there’s Brian, calm as a cucumber, painting Gabby as the "hysterical" one. Classic gaslighting. If emotional abusers had a playbook, this would be chapter one. It’s the art of making the other person question their own reality: "Oh, you’re upset? That’s weird because everything seems fine to me. Maybe you’re just being dramatic."
Then there’s isolation, another one of Brian’s favorite tactics. On a road trip in a tiny van, far from family and friends, Gabby had no escape. This allowed Brian to be her only support system, further tightening his grip on her emotional state. You see this in so many abusive relationships—the abuser creates an environment where the victim feels like they have no one else to turn to, which only deepens their dependence on the abuser. So, while their Instagram may have looked like #VanLifeGoals, behind the scenes, it was #EmotionalAbuseNightmare.
The Self-Obsessed Puppet Master
Let’s get into the meat and potatoes of Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). And no, we’re not just talking about someone who takes too many selfies. Narcissism, in its clinical form, is a far cry from your average Instagram influencer. We all narcissistic traits.We’re talking about a full-blown grandiose sense of self-importance, an insatiable need for admiration, and a total lack of empathy for others.
Let’s break it down with Exhibit A: Laundrie's obsession with controlling how others saw him. Whether it was how he presented himself to the police or the carefully curated social media presence, everything was about maintaining his image. People with NPD believe they are special, and they crave the admiration that reinforces this belief. But there’s a flip side to that coin—they also need someone to put down to keep their own ego afloat, and that someone was Gabby.
Brian’s total lack of empathy in their interactions, as seen in the Moab footage, also checks off a key symptom of NPD. Gabby is falling apart, and instead of comforting her or showing concern, Brian is all about self-preservation. He’s cool, detached, and laser-focused on one thing: not looking like the bad guy. People with NPD are experts at this—manipulating reality to suit their narrative, even if it means throwing someone else under the bus. In this case, that someone was Gabby.
If NPD doesn’t fully capture Laundrie’s level of emotional detachment and manipulation, Antisocial Personality Disorder (ASPD) might do the trick. This is a more dangerous diagnosis, characterized by a disregard for the rights of others, manipulation, and a lack of remorse. In short, people with ASPD tend to have zero respect for social norms or the feelings of other humans. They’re the type of people who can lie, cheat, steal, and harm others have no problems sleeping at night.
Exhibit B: Laundrie’s behavior after Gabby’s death. Not only did he show no sign of remorse, but he also fled the scene. Instead of turning himself in, he took off and evaded law enforcement for weeks. This is textbook ASPD behavior—it's not that people with ASPD don’t understand right from wrong, it’s that they don’t care. They’re driven by their own desires and impulses, consequences be damned.
Another telltale sign of ASPD is impulsivity, which we see in Laundrie’s actions leading up to and following Gabby’s death. His decisions seem erratic, from the escalation of violence to his flight afterward. People with ASPD are often unable to control their impulses, which can lead to criminal behavior or other dangerous actions—exactly what we saw in this case.
NPD vs. ASPD: Which One Fits?
So, where do we land on Brian Laundrie’s diagnosis? Is he more of a narcissist, or does antisocial personality disorder better explain his behavior? Truthfully, it could be a mix of both. NPD and ASPD are not mutually exclusive, and many people exhibit traits of both disorders. Laundrie seemed to have the grandiosity and need for control seen in NPD, paired with the lack of remorse and disregard for consequences associated with ASPD.
The reality is that these two disorders often overlap, creating a dangerous combination of traits that can make someone not just emotionally abusive, but potentially violent.
Emotional Abuse is a Red Flag (teen girls—read that again.)
The case of Brian Laundrie and Gabby Petito is a stark reminder of the dangers of emotional abuse and toxic control in relationships. While not every case of emotional abuse ends in violence, it is often the starting point for far more severe dynamics. Recognizing the signs early—gaslighting, isolation, control—can make the difference between escaping a toxic relationship and falling deeper into its grip.
For Gabby, the signs were there, but like so many people in abusive relationships, she likely didn’t see them for what they were—or didn’t know how to escape. Laundrie’s psychological profile is a chilling example of how emotional abuse can evolve into something far more dangerous.
While we may never know for sure what diagnosis fits Brian Laundrie perfectly, the evidence suggests a blend of Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Antisocial Personality Disorder. His manipulation, emotional abuse, and lack of empathy paint a picture of a man who viewed relationships as a means to an end—control.
So, the next time someone makes you feel like the "crazy one" in a relationship, gaslights you, or isolates you from your support system, take a step back. Trust your gut, and remember that emotional abuse is a serious red flag. If you or someone you know is in a situation like Gabby’s, it’s crucial to get help before things escalate. No #VanLife photo is worth that kind of emotional torment.
Sources:
American Psychiatric Association. (2013). Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (5th ed.).
National Domestic Violence Hotline. (n.d.). Understanding Emotional and Psychological Abuse.
The New York Times. (2021). Timeline of Gabby Petito’s Disappearance.
